Why do they ask me about resolutions?
It’s only barley a week into the New Year and I am sick of people asking me, what have you given up this year? What’s your New Year's resolutions?
Why is it that we are expected to make New Year resolutions? What if you are perfect already? Or what if you are happy with your less than perfect life and you couldn’t give a crap about giving up something or starting something new? All I want to do when someone asks me one of those questions, is to tell them to feck off, I didn’t make any new year's resolutions. I want to pull my hair out or poke their eyes out when they tell me all the good healthy and perfect resolutions they have made.
Miss Perfect
I remember the year I decided that the New Year’s resolutions were not going to get me down again. It all started when, let's call her “Miss Perfect” and I went for a coffee, she says to me half way through her huge Cappuccino that this will be her last coffee as tomorrow is the start of the New Year. She gives up something and starts loads of new crap every year. She goes on to tell me that she is planning on exercising every day and including healthy options in her daily food choices. No coffee and definitely no wine. Miss Perfect is off on the perfect start to the perfect disaster. I tell her she is setting herself up for disappointment yet again! That she should pick one thing to focus on. That trying to re write her life in one day is too much.
Would she listen?
She started of the first week or two fine and was hitting the gym at 6am every morning. The wine and coffee were gone. But then the pressure from work soon kicked in. One Friday evening after a really stressful day in work, on her way home she passed the Chinese takeaway. The off license was across the road. The words of her boss ringing in her ears and the thoughts of cooking yet another healthy meal was too much. She gave in, ordered the Chinese take away and while she was waiting for it to be ready, she ran across the road to pick up a bottle of red.
Setting yourself up for failure
It devastated her, she felt like a failure, only a few weeks in and already she had failed. She had planned on going the whole year without the take aways and wine. She moped around for the next week and dug into the chocolate, chips and fish fingers were back on the menu, coffee was there too. And after another few weeks we were back doing our regular coffee meetings and having the crack with our glass of red at the weekends.
My point is don’t set yourself up for failure. Take one day at time. Give up one thing if you must, start one new thing if you must. Do it one day, and one step at a time. I've given up on trying to change Miss Perfect, she will no doubt do the the exact same thing next year. But you! This little tale just might help you be more like me and then you don’t have to do anything at all.
Mandy